A Project of Texans for Natural Gas

Party of Science: Greenpeace Protestors Suspend from Hartman Bridge Ahead of Democratic Debate

Just when we thought Greenpeace was taking a break from their crazy antics, they surprised all of us by suspending from the Fred Hartman Bridge in Baytown, Tex., ahead of the Democratic Debate this evening. You know, because dangling off a bridge in Texas will totally solve climate change.

According to Greenpeace’s logic, suspending themselves will prevent the transport of oil and natural gas through the Houston Ship Channel. Except it really won’t, as the Port of Houston told a local newspaper:

The impact of the protest is “not going to be devastating,” [Port of Houston spokeswoman Lisa Ashley] said, adding that the schedules of vessels moving through ship channel allows for interruptions.

“When you’re talking about ships, they are transiting for months, weeks at a time,” Ashley said. “There are ebbs and flows in that schedule. A day here or there is already factored into the structure of planning.”

The protestors intend to stay in place for 24 hours, leaving us all wondering… did they bring snacks? Did they download a few movies to watch on their phones? What could they possibly be doing for 24 hours while suspended mid-air? You might ask, “Who cares what they’re doing?” Also fair.

The Coast Guard has reported that several ships are holding in place and part of the Houston Ship Channel is closed due to the demonstration. The La Porte Police Department and the Harris County Precinct 8 Constables Office are monitoring the scene. Early reports are that the event created a traffic jam, which is just ironic beyond belief, since idling cars = more greenhouse emissions.

Eventually the stunt will end and everyone else will be able to go back to work as usual. You know, because they have real jobs.